Guilty pleasures.

"Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely Spam! Lovely Spam!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus 1969-1974

Spam fritters.

We all have guilty pleasures. Monty Python seems to bring many of them to the fore. Men, and let's be honest it nearly is always men, of a certain age can quote great huge chunks of Python script verbatim.

Surely this has to be the guiltiest pleasure of them all. To be perfectly honest it was the batter that did it for me. Just writing this recipe I can feel my arteries furring up and my cholesterol level moving skywards.

Spam fritters one of those things that everyone professes not to like but secretly enjoys. A bit like putting a CD of 80’s power ballads in the car and then claiming they belong to your partner.

Whilst not confessing to a love of Bonnie Tyler, I would gladly shout from the rooftops that I love spam fritters. Strangely, plain cold and straight from the tin spam doesn’t do it for me, it has to have a crispy coat and be blisteringly hot before I entertain eating it.

Everything in moderation is fine so enjoy this culinary treat, just not too often! My apologies that this is not a recipe for Lobster thermidor aux crevettes, in the provencal manner, with shallots and aubergines, garnished with truffle pate, brandy a fried egg on top and spam, but the crevettes were off!

Mise en scene

1 can of Spam sliced into 1cm thick slices

100g plain flour

Pinch of salt

Ice cold sparkling mineral water

Flour for dusting

Oil for frying

It's all in the edit.

1. Place the spam tin into the refrigerator to chill for several hours before starting this recipe.
2. Remove the Spam from the tin and slice into 1cm thick portions. Place back into the fridge until needed.
3. Mix together the flour and sparkling mineral water until the batter is the thickness of double cream. If you don’t have sparkling mineral water add 1tsp of bicarbonate of soda to the flour instead. The secret to this batter is to use ice cold water.
4. Put the oil on to heat. You can shallow or deep fry depending on your bravery or your equipment.
5. Take the Spam out of the fridge and coat very lightly in flour. Remove any excess by patting the Spam gently. The flour will help the batter to stick. Dip the Spam into the batter and lay gently into the oil. The oil needs to be fairly hot or your batter will become soggy.
6. The fritters will take about two minutes on each side and about three or four minutes if you are deep frying. Remove from the oil when golden brown. DRAIN WELL.
7. Serve with mash and beans or peas. Ketchup is an optional accompaniment.
8. Sorry - "spam's off!"

Voiceover

If you really love Spam, visit Hawaii. It has become a national dish!